Felicity would have been 90 on 2 August 2025
Saturday 2 August 2025
Felicity’s 90th Birthday
Today would have been Felicity’s 90th birthday, and it is also exactly five months since she died. As mentioned earlier, I had thought that this might be the time to host a gathering here in her memory — but that time has not yet come. It will, in due course.
For now, I’m just trying to keep steady in the work and to stay close to the rhythms that have shaped our life for so long. Andrew is with us for the weekend which is a comfort for both James and me.
As many of you have experienced, I am sure that you will understand, this is a uniquely difficult path. There are no simple words to describe the ache, or the strange stillness that comes in the absence of such a vibrant, enduring presence
I do feel Felicity close — in the studio, in the house, in the ongoing life here at Bukkenburg — but of course it is not the same. The rhythms of grief and the foreverness of loss are just so bewildering.
There is so much to say about her. I hope, in time, to find the words — if there are any — to truly convey what she meant, and means still.
Felicity and I shared 53 incredible years together, working side by side in our home studio.
Top – Group of early pictures including Felicity and her sister Dorothea with their father Alan Ross, Felicity at piano, and with her mother Ruth Wolff out shopping in Johannesburg 1940s.
Bottom: Felicity photographed by the legendary photographer Sam Haskins – 1956
Felicity at 80 – Cape Town, 2 August 2015
Her love and involvement in the world of art and music ran through every part of her life. She studied art and commercial art at Johannesburg Art College in the 1950s, and her early work included watercolour, mixed media and design. From 1973 onward, she began painting and decorating the pots we made together — a partnership that remained at the heart of our shared life.
Before that, she had worked as a judge’s clerk at the Transvaal Supreme Court and later as a textile designer and commercial artist for Ernst Ullman, Penny le Roy, and others. She was also an early member of the team at Helen de Leeuw’s Craftsman’s Market in the basement of Greaterman’s in central Johannesburg — a vibrant space in its time.
Top left to right – At Giverny, in the studio with James Andrew and David, in the garden at Bukkenburg
Bottom – painting, with Sky and Fudge
Three sons were born during her first marriage. Her eldest, James — who many of you know — suffered a life-changing injury in a car accident at the age of four. Felicity’s lifelong care and devotion to James is something beyond words, and has been an ongoing inspiration. He is now 66 and lives at home with us.
James, Andrew and Thomas
We are fortunate to have been able to share a creative, loving life for more than five decades — exhibiting our work throughout South Africa and abroad, and working on commissions for designers and collectors. This work is ongoing.
Felicity’s love of music remained strong throughout her life, and she practised classical guitar regularly and with joy.
We also spent important years living and working as house parents and so much more at Camphill near Johannesburg. In the early years, she gave art and pottery classes for children, and later we were actively involved in community work including Camphill, the Alexandra Arts Centre, and Swellendam Alive.
Since 1996, our home and studio have been here in Swellendam, at Bukkenburg, where our gallery continues to show an ever changing and developing selection of our work. Felicity’s paintings are throughout the house and our guest cottage, and several can be seen on our website.
A selection of some of Felicity’s watercolours, pastels and textile designs
She was also a celebrated and widely respected cook and host — known and remembered by many for the flair and generosity she brought to any meal or event. Open studio weekends and other gatherings here were all the richer because of her unique and attractive style. Her approach to cooking — like her approach to everything — was wholehearted and inspired, and is warmly remembered in some of the publications featured on our website.
Hiking in Marloth, Swellendam
In the weeks following Felicity’s death, I received an invitation to become a member of the International Academy of Ceramics, based in Geneva and affiliated to UNESCO. Although the invitation came to me in a personal capacity, I have understood it — quietly and profoundly — as a reflection on the more than half a century of work that Felicity and I shared. I accepted it with deep appreciation, knowing how happy it would have made her. It brings me a sense of inspiration and renewed energy for the work and life ahead.
In Venice – Felicity at 70 with James
It was the deepest privilege and greatest joy to be Felicity’s life and work partner for all these years. The memories of our incredible time together — an amazing journey; the love, the work, the difficulties, the laughter, the people, the garden, and the quiet daily rituals — continue to accompany me.
That sense of closeness, in everything we shared, lives on in ways I continue to discover and will always treasure.
To all who have stood by us — and by me — especially since Felicity’s stroke in March last year, and through these past five months since her death: thank you. The care, love, and steady presence of so many, near and far, have helped to carry us through the most difficult of times. Your support — in messages, visits, practical help, and simply by being there — has been a lifeline.
I hold it all with such deep gratitude.
David, Felicity, James, Andrew – Photographed in December 2023
“So it’s true, when all is said and done, grief is the price we pay for love.”
EA Buccianeri, ‘Brushstrokes of a Gadfly’
